Hmm I wonder...

Created by Oatmeal

The single bullet theory defined

Single bullet theory: sin·gle bul·let the·o·ry /ˈsɪŋgəl/ˈbʊlɪt/theer-ee/: 1: A selective method of firing using one bullet per target, i.e. killshots only 2: Military sniper slogan, 'One shot, one kill' circa WWI 3: The preferred method of zombie dispatching, anything more than this is considered wasteful and deemed hazardous to survival in an undead world.

"So much for the single bullet theory..." - The Crow graphic novel

That was the first place I heard the words single bullet theory and automatically my brain went to the motto of one shot one kill and from that, naturally, it went to zombies. Too often I've seen people empty entire magazines either in panic or an attempted scythe maneuver and die screaming as soon as the last round is expended. I've seen one man go further counting the shots on his Colt Python magnum revolver than another going fully automatic with his rifle. If you must fire more than one round at a time the best piece of advice comes from an old space marine, Remember, short controlled bursts. 
Control is key when firing, don't panic!

Jerusalem over/out

Surviving Turkey Day

Survival tip of the (holi)day: Beware the turkey. Turkey contains an amino acid called tryptophan, when injested, especially while on an empty stomach (as will very quite possibly be the case in a survival scenario) causes the body to produce serotonin causing the person to grow drowsy and want to take a nap. Bear this in mind when eating on the run or any scenario where you aren't especially safe, but in a pinch it might help you drift off if you're having trouble. No one likes having to fight through the fog of having just been woken from a sound turkey sandwich coma.
Happy Thanksgiving from me at Single Bullet Theory!

Now if you'll excuse me I have a block of geeks to clear... that's what happens when you wake me up, I wake up angry. Lock n' load!

Living In The World Of Survival Horror

[Theme from John Carpenter's The Thing From Another World by Ennio Morricone] 
I chose this track in honor of the inches of ice and snow blanketing Seattle and for the morose tone of the article. Plus the energy-efficient streetlamps make me feel like I'm in Outpost #31. Enjoy!

Your zombie plan will fail. If you think otherwise, you may as well put your head between your legs and kiss your arse goodbye now. Plans never stay that way for long, especially when it comes to traversing the depraved new world. Wave goodbye to mass transit, modern convenience and microwave burritos as it's all going right into the toilet.

Take Seattle this week for example: Few inches of snow and the city shits itself and shuts down (3.5" fell in my neighborhood). The city itself is ill-equipped to handle a disaster, any disaster if this is all it takes.

Many of us dream of the day when the dead will walk without giving much thought into the horrors that lay in wait as a result. The people you love will die. The things you cared for will no longer exist. Money will mean nothing anymore, food and bullets, though, will be worth their weight in gold if not more. When civil order fails and martial law goes into full effect it will only get worse. When those designated to serve and protect jump ship and forsake the safety of the masses to protect their own asses and families, anarchy will reign supreme. All those bad elements will no longer be held in check and will run rampant. In short, it's going to be a one way ticket to chaos and literal Hell on Earth.

The term Survival Horror was coined in the very first Resident Evil game back in 1996 and it's aptly fitting. Unlike action games where the object is to shoot shoot shoot kill kill kill, survival horror places the player in a desperate situation with the odds stacked formidably against them with little to no weaponry or first aid items. Art imitates life and life imitates art. One can expect a similar situation when the real disaster strikes, but as stated previously and will be once again for emphasis: this is the real world, there is no reset button. If you fuck up here, it's Game Over for real.

So plan to fail. Never make one plan and expect it to go off without a hitch because it never will. One could make a hundred different plans, trying to account for as many different variables (weather, traffic, supplies etc) and always you'll run into the one scenario you didn't plan for (didn't expect that gas tanker truck to jackknife into a line of city buses packed to the gills with people trying to escape the city did you?).

Point being: it's not going to be as easy as you may have seen in the movies or played in the videogames. You won't be able to run to the never empty gun store and arm yourself to the teeth, swing by the camping store for all the dehydrated food and survival gear you'll need to survive, hotwire the nearest truck and book for the countryside. This is just one half of the phrase though, this is just the survival part... we haven't even gotten to the horror part.

Pick someone that matters a great deal to you. It could be a friend, a lover, a parent or sibling. Now imagine bearing witness to their gruesome screaming evisceration by a group of walking corpses and not being able to do a single thing except either sit and watch hopelessly waiting for them to notice you and be eaten yourself or force yourself to run, to leave them. Or imagine the one you love trying to take chunks of your flesh with their bare hands and teeth and being the one that's forced to put them out of their misery. Imagine the kind of lasting damage this would have on a person and leave them with.

Oh yeah and no handy dandy headshrinking doctors to help you cope or any drug they can give you to help you with the depression or traumatic stress following any of the encounters.

Feeling hopless yet?

Good! That's the point.

The Apocalypse isn't going to be a shiny glossy romp through dystopia on a Twinkie-hunt where no one gets hurt unless it's for a plot point. Don't fail to plan and do plan on failing. Being equipped for a zombie apocalypse means at least you'll be adequately prepared for any other sort of disaster whether it's fire, flood or earthquake.

Do

-Plan for failure (Expect the worst but hope for the best)

-Be as prepared as possible/Get Emergency supplies (food, water, radio, blankets etc)

-Be serious, this is your life and perhaps the lives of others who may be depending on you

-Expect your 'escape plan' to fail 99 times out of 100

-Have plenty of backup plans

Do not

-Expect this to just blow over and that you can get back WoW and 711 by week's end

-Expect this to play out "...just like that movie (game)", sometimes there is no such thing as a happy ending

-Be one of the people that goes running for the hills at the first sign of trouble, it will only get you killed

-Plan for success, like everything will be alright (your car WILL run out of gas, the freeway WILL be blocked, and you WILL run out of ammo at the WORST possible moment)

So prepare, plan... and pray you'll live through it. Sleep well kids!

Fighting for every inch of life

[This might sound familiar... a certain game about a group of 3 plus 1 that weren't supposed to make it... yes it's that one. I felt like writing but not something all my own... what can I say, my meeting didn't thwart my addiction, it only fed it. Oops... Anywhos... enjoy]

It was the killshot that did it. The final bullet between the eyes blew the stalking zombie backwards against the car and set off it's overly sensitive alarm, it's owner far beyond caring if it got stolen now or not. The cacophony of whoops and beeps echoed off buildings and reverberated down the street as if calling out to the night.

Then the night responded.

"Ugh this is gonna get bad," the oldest groaned from behind a cigarette

Everywhere there were shadows dancing and growing converging on them and a steady howl began to rise up out of the silence. The group checked their weapons and ammo and backed up against each other. Now there was a mob of them running as fast as they could towards them. They were coming from all directions, up and over the fence, out of the alleys.

Time slowed to a crawl as the mob just got larger and larger and closer and closer.

Alright you diseased sons of bitches, the gruffest thought to himself tightening his grip on his scattergun, come get som-what the fuck?

His moment of machismo quickly ended as something at the end of the block caught his eye. It was massive and with a roar it sent a parked car hurtling toward them. He didn't move, he narrowed his eyes and set his jaw. The others turned as the gnarled mass of metal and rubber flew past them smashing into the fence behind them unleashing even more infected.

"Run or shoot?" the panicked one asked "RUN OR SHOOT?"

"Run then shoot!" the oldest responded taking off running

The massive creature was barreling down the street after them paying no attention to what got in its way mowing through several mobs of the infected as it howled in rage at the survivors.

"There!" said the toughest chick they ever met pointing at an open alley

They ran and the infected followed.

"Get to the rooftop! It's our only chance!" panic yelled jumping for the closest fire escape

"Move! Go! Go!" tough responded taking point for some cover fire, "Come on, come on!" he insisted looking at the corner when suddenly from amidst the horde it came rampaging. For something so immense it moved quickly because before he could blink he had the wind knocked out of him and he was looking up at it rearing back to smash him into the pavement.

Thankfully his graying guardian angel in olive drab lit ugly up with a barrage from his rifle stunning it momentarily. It recovered and swung a massive fist at him, but he sidestepped and the enormous bulk of it went crashing through the brick wall. Instead of slowing it down it merely grabbed a hunk of concrete and hurled it at the humans on the fire escape. It bounced off the metal fixture causing it groan under the stress

As drab turned one of the infected was about on top of him when it's head exploded from above.

"Go! I'll hold them off!" she cried firing in sync with her dual 9's.

Ugly had crawled out of the bricks and was jumping for the fire escape, but the already damaged structure couldn't hold the weight and each jump bent and tore away great chunks of twisted metal.

She was still firing when it leaped straight at her tearing the floor from beneath her feet. The metal fell away from the building and she dove back towards the building, her eyes locking with the tattooed tough for a split second saying it all without a word  

ohmygodpleasedontletmefallpleasecatchme

His arm shot out and grabbed onto her, pulling her to safety.

Beneath the rest of the fire escape broke away and fell on top of the incredible hulking giant in a thundering crash and another screaming howl, this one in pain.

They collapsed into a heap on the roof

"We made it!" panic said without a trace of it and a bit of cockiness in his voice, "I can't believe we made it!"

"Son, we just made it across the street," the oldest said as he lit another cigarette, "no reason to go throwing a party..."

The other two just looked down at where they had just been, he was right though. They hadn't gone more than 50 feet from their safehouse of the last 24 hours... how were they going to get out of the city like this? They weren't so fortunate as to be included in the government's great evacuation plan along with the rest of the populace... no... it was though they were left for dead...



{please don't sue me valve?}

Update from the front lines - Survival 101

It's been +20 days since the first outbreak in Seattle. The recent outbreak has taught me more than any other encounter could have. Some of my preconceived thoughts and notions were only furthered, meanwhile a few took a dent or two. 

One thing I've taken into heavy consideration is my own preparedness for the next outbreak. I've survived before but only by sheer dumb luck and relying on those killer instincts. So in the spirit of "Always being prepared" I've hashed together a few more vital pieces of information regarding survival.

1) The single bullet theory - My first rule in survival. The single bullet theory. I know some geniuses and hotshots like to try and show their marksmanship by double tapping a target in the head but I, personally, find this pointless. Like a certain well known and mocked actor proclaimed in a film, If you can't do it with one bullet, don't do it at all. Also regarding the American way of shooting enough bullets hoping you'll hit the target.

Now, figuring the average speed and pace of walker isn't very speedy if one takes their time and doesn't panic when squeezing (not pulling) the trigger, a single effective killshot maybe executed. Myself, I tend to favor closer quarters than most not out of arrogance or bravado but accuracy. 

This is a famous picture from the Vietnam war shot by Associated press photographer Eddie Adams of General Nguyễn Ngọc Loan of the National Police executing a Vietcong prisoner.

Nguyễn Ngọc Loan executing Nguyễn Văn Lém - Wikipedia

Now as brutal as the image is, consider if the executed prisoner were a rampaging zombie trying to take a chunk out of you. A shot at that close of range to that specific region is going to be a near guaranteed kill. One shot, one kill as the old sniper slogan goes. Also consider facing off with an odd number of attackers and only enough rounds for an even number of them, or what if the worst case happens and you are bitten and out of ammo. The only thing worse than being eaten by them would possibly have to be being forced to die and reanimate. 

2) Silence. It's golden as any theater will tell you. As neat as guns are and how we all love them, I must express my own disapproval of them. Studies have shown that walking dead are attracted to any loud noises and gunshots are just that. As far as the sound can travel, figure there are going to be lots of dead ears that will pick up on it and be drawn to its location. So this is why if a fight is absolutely necessary, Be Quiet. If you've had any sort of martial arts or military training one already is aware of the advantage of a stealthy approach to a loud boisterous one. Noise draws attention and attention will get you overwhelmed and killed. So that being said and ruling out the usage of silenced firearms, nothing beats a good old fashioned blade, bludgeon or effective melee-type of weapon. 

I like knives and blades. The trick though is to weed out the flashy glam-my junk that will only serve to get you killed and find something dependable, reliable and won't falter at a crucial moment (as it will, Murphy's Law that anything can and will go wrong is in full effect in a Z-Day scenario). Perhaps it's my own personal xenophilia but I tend to favor Japanese styled blades. Whether it be a katana sword or a a tanto bladed knife I'm all for it. 

Cold Steel Emperor Series

3) Gear. This is something I'm still working on personally and I'll come back to this periodically the more I know. But here is what I do know: Max Brooks states in the Zombie Survival Guide (or ZSG as I shall abbreviate from henceforth) that you need to be ready at a moments notice to grab your bag and go. As the name implies a Bug Out Bag is vital. It should contain all the essentials, Meals Ready to Eat (MREs), pouches of water, medical and first aid supplies, radio, ammunition, clothing and essential tools. I'm doing my research on military rigging equipment and packing systems such as the ALICE and MOLLE gear systems. But a hiking pack would also be sufficient as well. Just make sure the weight is tolerable and not cumbersome, you will need to hike and in some instances be ready to fight. Either way as previously stated, be prepared! 

4) Ultimate zombie combating tip courtesy of Max Brooks

As in any martial art, the first rule is not to fight but to run away! Keep that in mind! In closing we must all be prepared for the coming onslaught, but as prepared as we may be in terms of outfitting ourselves nothing will prepare us for the horrors you'll endure during the outbreak. 

Remember kids, one shot one kill... you might need that last one for yourself

Dead in 60 Seconds - Arming Yourself For Survival in Under a Minute

[This was an idea Ryan had that just didn't quite pan out but I wrote on it anyway without going too far into detail since I wasn't sure what kind of angle I would end up using... so I just kept all 3, I plan on doing individual articles on Ma on Brooks as they are both sources of excellent info]

"If I had some duct tape, I could fix this." - Macgyver

Your worst fear has come true. The dead have risen. The TV is buzzing with reports of attacks and telling you to destroy the brain. The sirens and screams are getting louder. Suddenly there's a slow incessant pounding on your door.

The dead are here.

You've got less than a minute before they break down your door and are after you. Quickly you grab whatever is lying around the house in order to defend yourself. These few seconds are all that stand between you and a grisly death, make them count!

Most of the time when asked what they would do if an apocalyptic situation involving zombies were to arise, most people will state something about getting their chainsaw and their favorite boomstick and going to town. While this worked in the Evil Dead films even Bruce Campbell is noted to regard the significant weight to wielding a chainsaw.

Too often people are lulled by creature comforts or modern luxury. Certain shortages of supplies are often considered in disaster situations: food, water, medicine but rarely is ammunition considered. Since the discovery of gunpowder by the Chinese to repel invading Mongols, modern warfare has never been the same. As a society and a species we are too reliant upon guns to solve our problems both domestically and internationally. But what if there was suddenly no ammunition left to be had? Where would that leave you? Do you know how to manufacture your own bullets? Do you have the tools? The time? The technical know-how? If so, then you have a leg up on the rest of the populace and a bit of an advantage. For the rest of us poor sods, we need to learn to make the best out of what we have on hand. This is where weapon improvisation can be a life saving skill if properly utilized. Break out the duct tape!

So in your one minute rampage to grab various odds and ends to craft your zombie eliminating weapon of doom, you remembered to grab something to hold it together with right? I mean the last thing you need is for your spearhead to fall off before trying to impale a zombie (and no that’s not a euphemism for necrophilia, perv).

Chuck Green of Capcom’s Dead Rising 2 is the ultimate Macgyver master of duct tape ingenuity. Give this motor cross handyman any number of random items and it will be a guaranteed zombie killer. From the dead simple, a spiked baseball bat, to the brutally efficient, a vacuum cleaner mounted with saw blades or a motorcycle loaded with chainsaws. The game is probably a shining example of what not to do in real life, but then again what video game isn’t? But that’s not the point, the point is to get creative and kill zombies in the most imaginative ways possible (I’d like a pitchfork-mounted shotgun if I thought I could get away with it in the real world!). Get creative! Have fun with it! If you screw up, hey there’s the reset button for a reason. Enjoy it! For if there is ever such an outbreak you’d best remember: The game is your life, if you die its game over man.

Author Max Brooks goes into extensive weapons detailing in his book Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead. He makes special note that you want something light, portable and sharp and to go for straight edges as well since serrations have a tendency of getting caught in flesh at inopportune moments. Guns cause noise, noise draws attention, attention gets you killed so silence is a key factor. Katanas, crowbars and machetes are usually considered for their effectiveness and reliability. The key to any tool is knowing how to handle and use it.

Roger Ma takes some of the key points set out by Max Brooks and runs even further with them. Have you considered your exact point of attack on a zombie? Sure hit it in the head, but are you sure you'll make a killshot or will your weapon just get stuck? Consider improvised weapons before trying to find a replica of a classic. Take for example the handy dandy sidewalk scraper at your local hardware store over the shiny lethal looking sword from the mall cutlery store, which do you think will be more effective? Read Roger Ma's Zombie Combat Manual to find out valuable info!

So if you don't own either of these books, what are you waiting for? Go get them now! Your survival of the zombie apocalypse may depend on it!